“Therefore, kings, be wise;
be warned, you judges of the earth.
Serve Adonai with fear;
rejoice, but with trembling.” (Psalm 2:10-11)
“…keep working out your deliverance with fear and trembling, for God is the one working among you both the willing and the working for what pleases him. Do everything without [fretting] or arguing, so that you may be blameless and pure children of God, without defect in the midst of a twisted and perverted generation, among whom you shine like stars in the sky, as you hold on to the Word of Life.” (Philippians 2: 12b-16a)
Stars who rejoice with fear and trembling… Obedience is deliverance.
I want to cling to the Word of Life with such fervor that His light fills me. How wonderful to be consumed by the blazing radiance that both cauterizes and comforts. How wonderful to rejoice in the glow that blinds to give sight. I want to spend my days trembling in awe as His light shines out from me. How good to reverence the incandescent glory of which I am permitted to communally partake. How good to fear misrepresenting myself as the source of this beauty and power.
Stars who rejoice with fear and trembling… I want that.
Obedience to the Lord can take very different forms. Sometimes we must simply have an attitude of submission (although anyone can attest that submission is not exactly simple); at other times action is required as well. The willing and the working. Obedience is deliverance. We become stars who rejoice with fear and trembling.
One morning, the Lord told me to offer a meeting invitation to an acquaintance. Throughout the day, I prayed repeatedly about this—asking the Holy Spirit to tell me exactly how I should go about fulfilling the Lord’s command. Late in the evening I discovered something: a message sent earlier the same day by this very acquaintance, asking if we could meet. In this case, I simply needed to submit.
Over the past two weeks, the Lord has begun prompting me to share a sizable portion of my personal testimony with you, dear reader. After seeking the council of others, and much time spent in prayer, I am moving forward in obedience through action….with a great deal of fear and trembling. I must request your support right now: please pray! If I am truly obedient to relive events in the manner I am directed to, these posts will not be easy for me to write. And if I submit myself to the detailed examination necessary to write what he has asked of me, these posts will not be easy for you to read. So for both of our sakes, dear reader, please pray! Let’s walk in the brilliant shining of deliverance. Let’s become stars who rejoice with fear and trembling.
20 comments:
Let me just say, friend, sharing parts of your life with others (whether friend, foe, or stranger) is never simple and most definately not easy. Be of good cheer and great courage; do what you know God is telling you. You cannot go wrong when you are following Him. =)
That's absolutely true. Thanks for the encouragement!
All posts?...right? My short term memory is kicking in. x_x
For the record, I didn't even know if I was right. It was just something that was bugging me. I even doubted I was right anyways.
I had a question on something you wrote in your letter. You asked me a question...something like do you really know something.... I didn't really understand what you were asking and now I forget what it was you asked to begin with.... ??
Yes, anyone is more than welcome to post comments pertaining to the subject matter addressed. Glad to have you! ^_^
As for your question, I asked if you know how the true/pure form of Protection is supposed to look and feel. You and the Lord can work on that one, my friend.
What is protection to begin with?
That's a good question. For now, I'll let you discuss it with the One who loves you best and protects you always.
I have a feeling this topic will come up as I begin sharing my testimony.
What are we rejoicing about? (not in an "everything is horrible" kind of way, but a "just making sure I'm not missing something" kind of way)
I'm just rejoicing in the Lord's work and continued faithfulness. Right now He is breaking my heart...but the pain should always cause me to rejoice. After all, He is not required to replace my heart of stone with one of flesh. Nothing but His own goodness and love demands that he purify me. In the midst of heartache, I am tremendously awed that the Most High God *wants* me to enter His throneroom. Wants *me*...
Thanks for asking, dear friend. I'm continuing to pray for your own tearful rejoicing, as well.
I asked myself what would I give to grow about a year and a half ago. I answered that I would give up anything. I pleaded with God to help me and "grow me" no matter what it took. He said "ok."
Do I regret what I said? In the midst of everything and after already losing so much, did I change my mind?
No.
Every tear was worth getting more of Him. It's still extremely hard. New things happen everyday and life can make me angry and depressed. But now I find myself randomly grinning and laughing and it's when I think about His beauty. :D w00t! God!
...Not that I needed to post that. 9_9
^_^ We are a body of believers, my friend; sharing something wonderful like that is never a waste of time.
Thank you, Lord! <3
It's still so hard though! :P
When it becomes easy, we'll be in heaven. (And we'll be dancing...)
I wanna go home!
I know, dear friend. I know. But the short span of your days within the realm of conflict has not ended yet. And the One who can always hold you close will never cease to do so. Press in, my friend. Trust Him in the midst of darkness and chaos. Just hold on. Trust Him: He will lead you to the stairs carved into the wall of this deep hole. And trust those who love you: they will not abandon you.
Are you one of those? *tears*
Yes, I am. (At least, I would like to think so.)
Our Lord and Lover always gives us the support we need in any situation. Although we may feel abandoned, too surrounded or beaten down to recognize those supports at the time, once we reach the open air above our holes, He directs us to look back in: and then we can see that many of the dark things never reached us. The worst ones are muzzled, and chained to the walls. Others lie dead where they were cut down by fellow travelers, many of whom we heard--people we thought had ignored our cries for help and passed by, callously leaving us all alone in torment. The Lord is your provider and defender, dear reader. Trust that He is taking care of you.
Then why do I keep getting hurt by the "fellow travelers" who keep saving me from these impending dooms? Why is it when I need to talk no one's there, but when anyone else needs to talk there's magically time? Why is it so important to ask me if certain things are ok when everything else is fine and we'll just let her find out about it later by accident? Why do my “fellow travelers” have to tell me they trust me when they don’t and that I have integrity in their eyes and I don’t have any such thing? Why do I even stick around, when two of my travelers are off hunting mushrooms in the woods and the other keeps getting distracted by the pretty birds? Why should I? I am tired of being lied to and told I’m morally upright and trusted when I’m not. I’m tired of getting hurt. I’m tired of being left out, forgotten, and overlooked – intentional or not, seen or not. I’m tired; I’m worn out. Two of my best friends are gone and my teacher is sometimes around when she has the time. But somehow, even with all that distance between me and everyone else I still manage to get hurt the most by those who aren’t around. Why am I sharing with you my thoughts at all? Why am I writing on your blog after I told you I wouldn't? Sorry, I'll try my best to keep shut up.
You said two very important things yesterday. First of all, you said, "I'm tired." I fully believe you, dear friend. More importantly, the One who loves you best knows that you are weary, frayed. This may sound trite or calloused but He is holding you securely. I'm sure you feel exposed, vulnerable, defenseless...but His protection surrounds you always. You belong to Him, my dear friend, and He jealously guards what He holds. I'm sure you struggle to remember or believe that at times (we all do). But know this (*know* it deep in your spirit, my friend): You have never slipped from His hand. And you never will.
You also said that you're being "left out, forgotten, and overlooked." Perhaps that is true. If so, what will you do? Will you foster the wounds of heart? Will you choose to dwell in bitterness? If you are in fact being left out, then--regardless of the motivations of others--I would suggest that the Lord wants some alone-time with you. *So how are you using this time, dear friend?*
While I cannot, should not, judge the motives of another's heart, I would hazard a guess that your friends are not ingoring or abandoning you. If they are not deliberately overlooking you, yet you feel like they are, then I would advise you to do two things. First of all, rebuke the enemy. Rebuke him out loud, repeatedly if you need to. State the Truth, my friend, especially in those times when it does not "feel" true. Secondly, trust your friends. You might do this out loud as well. You or I cannot know the motivations or thoughts of another human being. THere may be a great deal happening behind the scenes. The Lord does not necessarily work in the manners we expect or prefer. (I'm sure you know this, but now is the time to restate the obvious.) Joy is a discipline; Trust is a discipline as well. We must *fight* to trust our Lord and our friends.
I hope this helps in some fashion, Imoutochan. I'm always praying for you.
Thank you for your words the other night. They gave the strength to keep going (and stick around ;)). And while I haven't had enough sleep to offset the 11 days yet, it was still a huge blessing and help. Thank you my friend. You are in my prayers as always and I digitalize my love to send with you. XOXO
Post a Comment